Real Mums Stories : Surviving mummying, wifeing and a few more challenges

“Hey there, my name is Kirsty. I am a Mum of four amazing cherubs and a loving wife to my hubby. I am one heck of a busy Mum, but I am learning to make space for the things important to me as well. These include myself, food, cars, food and some crafts. Did I mention food?

Kirsty talks family, health, turning 40, and regaining control of her goals

I’ve been cruising Healthy Mummy Groups, since The Healthy Mummy was small and just getting going. I used to post all the time, sometimes multiple times a day. I started losing a ton of weight and was super proud of myself, but then, life got in the way! Well and truly in the way!

I managed to re-gain the weight I’d lost and, in the meantime, popped out a couple more kids!

Yep, I’m a Mum of four cherubs, of which, three of these adorable angels (run with it) have special needs. We have all been through a lot medically. My two oldest have Neurofibromatosis Type 1. My son, aged 12, has a couple of brain tumours that are taking away his sight. He also suffers with Scoliosis, a heart deformity, an intellectual disability and autism.

My daughter, aged 16, has an intellectual disability and last year, during the COVID-19 pandemic, she had to have a large tumour removed from her brain. Thankfully, they managed to save her life, despite the fact she had a hole in her skull, that was way more dangerous than they thought!

At the time we didn’t know if she was going to survive!  She did and now has a titanium plate in her skull with 10 screws (she’s most proud of the 10 screws!). Adding to all that, our third has just been diagnosed with autism. My table is so very full as a Mum and I also have a 3-year-old to look after!

Mummying and Wifeying

Through all the mummying and wifeing (yeah I made it up), I also managed to survive a few blood clots in my lungs. Cue blood thinners for life, and a few more complications in addition to that! I won’t bore you with all the details, everyone has stuff on their plate, and some also have significant things to battle with.

Through it all, I lost ME, the individual. I started overcompensating with the kids and things became a little chaotic till recently. A few months ago, I had some surgery which put me on bed rest. I listened to my family, I read, I looked at myself and realised it’s time to take my health so much more seriously.

Truthfully, I had had this talk with myself when I shaved my head for charity last year.

This time though, it felt different. Yes I wanted to lose weight, but I also wanted so much more than that. I wanted to be healthier, both physically and mentally. I wanted more routine in my home too. All of this could be achieved by finding myself again.

Life begins at 40

I’m turning 40 this year…. a midlife crisis maybe? No! I’m calling it “my personal wisdom learnt from lurking in groups and reading other amazing women’s stories”, midlife crisis is shorter though! I’ve been so focused on making sure everyone else is ok, that I let go of some pieces of me that I loved. Like, I love shoes. I absolutely love spending time on myself and doing my makeup. Exploring new places and going on little adventures. I have a kayak that I bought over six months ago, and truth is, I haven’t got on it because I’m scared I’ll sink it!

Sustainable Weight Loss

So, it’s time….Time to look at me. I mentioned, that I wanted to get physically healthy and, yes, I wanted to lose weight. I feel that the less fat I have around my organs the better. But, I want to achieve this in a sustainable way and that, as always, brought me back to The Healthy Mummy. In our family life, where we have over 20 specialists and therapists (some weeks, over 15 appointments). I need the simplicity of  The Healthy Mummy! I need to be able to make life work in a way, where, the fatigue and emotional stress, don’t get in the way, and become excuses.

Life Goals

I’m setting myself 3 goals to improve in my life:

1. My physical health
2. My mental health
3. My house routine and organisation.

I believe all these are linked.

Instead of setting myself up to fail. I will make it achievable!

I weigh 121 kilos, my goal is to get down to 80 kilos. Is that realistic? Hell yes!! I just need to break it down into achievable mini-goals. I want to be under 100 kilos before my 40th birthday in August. How? By opening The Healthy Mummy App, instead of looking at the pretty pink icon on my phone! Numbers, are not the most important thing to me, getting fitter is!

Lifestyle Changes

To improve my mental health, I have been working hard on my inner belief system. I believe, I am now at the point, where I can do this, despite the unknowns of my children’s health. I want to continue nurturing my mental health with the help of my Doctor.

Writing this blog has been one of my first steps in showing that I do believe in ME! That yes! I am worth sharing. How do I know I’m attaining this goal? Simple really, I feel strong enough, within myself, to push through the hard times to achieve the lifestyle changes I want!

Finally, organisation and routine. My home needs some TLC. It needs the me, I used to be, when I had the energy and drive and wasn’t overwhelmed by life. We need labels, charts and tools for the cherubs to help them through their anxieties, sensory needs, meltdowns and surgeries. To also help, if the time comes when chemo is pulled out the cupboard, which is so often spoken about.

My motivation in all this…..

Not my kids,

Not my husband,

I can’t even say you…

My motivation is ME!!!”