Sascha Farley on how to develop self love: ‘Be kind to yourself’

As mums, we’re often too hard on ourselves, especially when if we are feeling tired or stressed. Our internal voice may criticise the way we parent or how we look, and this could cause your self-esteem to plummet, often leading to emotional eating and making poorer food choices.

One of the biggest struggles people find is to stay motivated and upbeat while embarking on a weight loss journey. That’s why it’s important to boost your confidence and take the time for self-care and self-love.

Sascha Farley shares her thoughts on how to develop self love and confidence…

Sascha’s tips on how to develop self love

I wish there was a self love supply switch, because I’d turn it on and leave it on. Sadly as we know, it’s not that simple, it’s an ongoing mindset and mental battle we all have to work on. Throw motherhood into the mix and it’s a whole other layer.

Self love isn’t about loving every single part of your body all the time. It’s about being kind to yourself throughout all the different versions of you.

It’s about giving yourself the time and space to be as you need to be during certain phases of your life – example the newborn phase calls for surviving and a shift of focus to that rather than physical goals.

There is a time and a place for everything, health looks different on everyone and it also encompasses different things at different times.

My biggest tips are below and I know it’s not as simple as reading a list and changing all of a sudden. So let’s look at all these points as behaviours and habits, that we can slowly learn and shift over time. It’s about re-wiring your brain and thought pattern away from what we are conditioned to.

1. Stop the comparison cycle. No one is you, every BODY is different and everyone is different. We experience life differently, our genetics, goals, lifestyles etc are all different so comparing is simply inaccurate, there is no way to ever fairly compare. No one person is better than another, repeat that to yourself daily.
2. Unfollow – yes this is a social media one. It’s such a fabulous tool but it is also a trap. Unfollow anyone who doesn’t spark joy, motivation or education for you. Cleanse your feed and you will feel so much more free. I can guarantee this.
3. Self talk. Catch the way you talk to yourself. Ask yourself, would I talk to a friend like this? The answer is usually no, so why would you treat yourself that way?
4. More than. You are more than a body, so if you find yourself in a constant state of not feeling good enough based on your size – ask yourself is this information true? Start a journal about your thoughts so you can catch yourself out and start shifting into a new perspective.
5. Do it for love. Make changes because you LOVE yourself and your body and the fact you want to take care of you. If you come from a place of love rather than punishment you are more likely to stick to the changes you wish to make.
6. Wish. Wish to be the woman you want your daughter to be. Be the role model you wished you had, this one is a great starting point because it really brings you back to what you NEED and using this as a foundation of your mindset shift will help immensely.

If you need help right now

If you are experiencing depression, feel overwhelmed or an inability to cope with daily problems or activities then it is vital you seek help straight away.

See your GP to discuss your symptoms, visit beyonblue.org.au, call Perinatal Anxiety & Depression Australia (PANDA) on 1300 726 306 or Lifeline on 13 11 14 to speak to someone immediately.

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