Lifestyle

This mum’s open letter to husband resonates with all mums: ‘I need help!”

Sometimes the best way to express your feelings to someone is to write them a letter, which is what this mum has done for her husband – and her words have resonated with mums everywhere, as it’s gone viral!

Here’s what mum-of-two, Celeste Erlach, has to say about putting her hand up and asking for help from her partner.

Mum’s open letter to her husband asking for help

Celeste’s letter has received over 1,300 comments and almost 5,000 shares – with many mums relating to everything she says.

“Dear Husband, I. Need. More. Help,” Celeste shared in the note, which she posted on the Breastfeeding Mama Talk Facebook page.

“I asked you to watch the baby so I could go to bed early. The baby was crying. Wailing, really.

“I could hear him from upstairs and my stomach knotted from the sound, wondering if I should come down there and relieve you or just shut the door so I could get some desperately needed sleep. I chose the latter.”

letter
Source: Pixabay

“Just a few hours of precious sleep. Is that too much to ask?”

Celeste continued that her hubby came into the room 20 minutes later with the baby still crying, and placed the baby in the bassinet.

“I wanted to scream at you. I wanted to launch an epic fight that very moment. I had been watching the baby and the toddler all damn day,” she tells him.

“I was going to be waking up with the baby to feed him all damn night. The least you could do is hold him for a couple of hours in the evening so I can attempt to sleep.

“Just a few hours of precious sleep. Is that too much to ask?”

argument
Source: Unsplash

Times have changed

Celeste talked about how her parent’s generation took on the more traditional roles in the past and highlighted how times have changed.

“I see us falling into these family dynamics more and more each day. My responsibility to feed the family, keep the house clean, and take care of the kids is assumed, even as I return to work,” says Celeste.

“I blame myself for most of it too. I have set the precedent that I can do it. And in truth I want to. No offence, but I’m not sure I want to know what a week’s worth of dinner would look like with you in charge.”

“Maybe everyone is secretly struggling?”

The mum-of-two reveals that while others seem to manage, maybe they are secretly struggling.

“I also see my friends and other moms (sic) doing it all, and doing it well. I know you see it, too. If they can manage it, and if our mothers did it so well for us, why can’t I?” she ponders.

“I don’t know. Maybe our friends are playing the part in public and secretly struggling.

“Maybe our moms suffered in silence for years and now, thirty years later, they simply don’t remember how hard it really was. Or maybe, and this is something I berate myself over every single day, I’m just not as qualified for the job as everyone else. And as much as I cringe just thinking it, I’m going to say it: I need more help.”

Busy Philipps on her unsupportive husband: ‘He didn’t understand how to be a dad’

How to deal with an unsupportive partner

41 per cent of mums reveal their biggest obstacle for losing weight is their partner

sex life mobile phones couple

“Part of me feels like a failure… I need help”

Celeste wrapped up the note by explaining to her partner that she needs help and that the reason for her letter is that she’s just admitting she’s human.

“Part of me feels like a failure for even asking. I mean, you do help. You are an amazing father, and you do a great job with the kids…. But I’m human, and I’m running on five hours of sleep and tired as hell. I need you,” she says.

“On weekends, I need more breaks. Times where I can get out of the house by myself and feel like an individual. Even if it’s just a walk around the block or a trip to the grocery store.”

Celeste finally adds: “Lastly, I need to hear you’re grateful for all I do. I want to know that you notice the laundry is done and a nice dinner has been prepared. I want to know you appreciate that I breastfeed at all hours and pump when I’m at work when it would be easier for me to formula feed….

“But I’m waving a white flag and admitting I’m only human. I’m telling you how much I need you, and if I keep going at the pace I’ve been on, I will break. And that would hurt you, the kids, and our family.

“Because, let’s face it: you need me, too.”

Well said, Celeste. Thank you so much for giving us permission to share your letter.

The Healthy Mummy Support Group

Community Mums

Need support? Look no further than our huge community of mums, who will support and encourage you. Join our supportive community.

Losing weight can be really tough. But losing weight isn’t just about dieting and exercising – it’s about being in the right place mentally to change your life and on the Healthy Mummy plans we are here to help you achieve your goals.

Push yourself and sign up for the 28 Day Weight Loss Challenge, click here for more info.

jennifer
written by:

Jennifer Hartnett

Jennifer is our Senior News Producer with a passion for trending news and lifestyle stories. Jennifer spends the rest of her time running around after her son Kian.