Healthy Mummy community member Madeline has made a commitment to transform her health and reach her goals and she is well on her way! Here she talks about coming to terms with her Post Natal Depression and how getting her physical health in check with The Healthy Mummy was just the push she needed to get support for her mental health.
Meet Madeline Gilbert
“Hi I’m Madeline, a Healthy Mummy and Wife. I’m an extremely confident person, I’m straightforward, honest and always looking for the positives in most situations. I will sit and listen to any friend that needs me, I will offer support, comfort and ice-cream when needed.”
“People often comment how comfortable I am within myself, how great my relationship is, how cruisy of a parent I am and how beautiful I am (when I’m not rocking the mum bun, half awake, leggings look). But, little do they know, that on a daily basis I’m actually wearing a mask; I like to call it the “Smiling Assassin” mask.”
Fighting a Hidden Battle
“I fight a battle that is hidden from the public eye and for a long time it was hidden from myself. I always thought I could never get Postal Natal Depression, I love my child and I’ve never had a negative thought about or towards my son. He is my world, how could I feel down when I have the brightest shining light in front of me. Although he stood tall and bright in my eyes, the rest of the world around me was slowly crumbling without me noticing.
Having a baby in the middle of a pandemic is an experience like no other. It is a scary, lonely journey. You miss out on all the “firsts” with your partner that you watched friends experience and you feel like you have no right to complain. You develop jealousy and sadness whilst feeling the most happiest emotions you’ve ever had. It is one crazy road! I used this as an excuse to let myself go, to become bitter and feel like no one wants to listen because there are worse things happening in the world.”
“I need help”
“There is no more hiding, no mask to wear, this is me and my real life.”
“My relationship is so strong and we have so much love for each other, but we are nowhere near perfect. I’ve never been a touchy person and my friends who really know me know I don’t hug, you have to be one darn special person for me to hug. Unfortunately post-baby, this now takes effect on my love life; I am touched, crawled over and constantly needed by a little human 24/7, so why would I want to be touched and needed by a big human?”
“My temper and patience are short-lived when it comes to others, as who has time to deal with other people’s dramas when I need to commit every minute of the day to my one little human. It took me 5 wonderful, fun, beautiful months, but extremely hard months, to say “I need help”, “some things not right” and “I’m not coping”.
“I was being unfair on the loved ones that were around me, as well as unfair towards myself!”
“I stopped dedicating every minute of my day to my son, the upkeep of my house and holding up reputation and started dedicating some time to myself. I WILL eat when I’m hungry, I WILL relax when my son is sleeping and I WILL put myself first when I can and not feel guilty about it! Then things started moving forward, becoming clearer and becoming more enjoyable.”
“My fiancé and I started a challenge for the month of February, every day we had to kiss for 6 seconds (although it always turned into about 12!). No matter what mood we were in, if we were arguing or even if we were extremely busy, we had to stop and take that time (even though it was short) for us. This was something that involved just us, no one else, not our son, just US! We always felt better afterward, we’d have a little giggle and a joke and everything seemed ok again”
Finding The Healthy Mummy
“I am extremely blessed to have such an amazing family support system. I am also glad to be a part of a program that supports mothers in all situations, good or bad. Getting my physical health in check with Healthy Mummy was the push I needed to get my mental health in check.”
“No one has to fight a battle alone, but it is you, and only you who can change the situation. I chose to change my situation, ask for help and take support when offered. Rather than looking back on things, I will only look forward and boy, I have so much to look forward to. I get to watch my son grow in front of my eyes every day, I’m currently in the middle of planning a wedding with my soulmate and I get to see my life transform constantly becoming clearer and brighter.”
I was not alone, YOU are not alone, WE are not alone.
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